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The teacher, a woman who hadn't smiled since 1994, froze. The class turned as one. Anton scrambled to silence the phone, but in his panic, he accidentally hit "Speaker."
Anton erupted in giggles. It was the peak of comedy. He set it as his default ringtone and went to sleep, dreaming of social stardom.
At first, there was silence. Then, a sound emerged that was definitely not a cat laughing. It was a high-pitched, distorted voice that sounded like a chipmunk screaming underwater. It was followed by a series of aggressive, rhythmic farts and a man yelling, "HELLO?! IS ANYONE HOME?!" in a thick, unidentifiable accent.
He opened a browser and typed the only thing that mattered: